Why I have no more room for my metal head friends.

I found that metal heads and conservatives have a lot in common most of the time. There is an underlying theme of insecurity and fear driving the entire ideology and lifestyle. A conservative lives in a world of fear based the idea that everyone is going to hurt us, take our stuff, and we need to be completely self reliant without cooperation to be happy and successful. This premise is built on the idea of fear, so we need to keep everyone at a distance where they cannot hurt us so we can build up our strength and keep from ever being hurt. This likely stems from prior pain in the life of many people who think like this. Even Christianity is built on a similar premise of looking to an outlet for strength and hope that is prayed to in order to find hope for change, but a real change can only come when we face a fear instead of projecting it into a being that we hope will take care of our problems for us, or performing all actions unto a being where the only pay back is a reward deferred in heaven. Christians like conservatives live in a world of credit, where they continually invest in things and ideas now instead of people now, and there is a hope for happiness and rewards later.

Metal heads are very similar because they too live in a world of fear and insecurity. They became metal heads because they did not belong in the mainstream and a subculture of fear is created. One may point out that that they seem aggressive and angry so how can they be fearful? I would point out that an animal shows its teeth when it is fearful and is therefore aggressive to ward off enemies. We may not always show our teeth, but the aggression of our words and actions are a defense mechanism we create to scare away what we see as potential harm. People who act tough are fearful to put it simple. The only difference between and a metal head and a hardcore kid is that hardcore kids realize others are as fearful as they are and form rape gangs to beat up on others out of their insecurity. Just as the Christians project their fears and insecurities into another being, the metal head projects all their fears and insecurities into anger, because anger is a safe place to hide. Anger gives us a sense of power, but anger is not real power unless it gets results. There are proper instances to be angry so people do not step on us, but to live angry all the time is like wallowing in our own mud. Instead of changing the things these people are fearful of, they choose to live in denial of their pain and be angry, or they choose to accept their problems and be consciously angry about them because it gives a sense of power, but this sense of power does not actually improve their lives. It just gives them an excuse not to change so they can be angry that their life is not that great and remain feeling powerful.

This is why power cannot be found by investing in things and ideas the way it can be found by investing in people. I understand that material well being is important to living well, but to have material well being without happy people around us leaves us still that much more insecure and fearful of those who do not share our well being, because they might take it or harm us in some way. Anger does not change a problem beyond the short term in most cases and neither does projecting our problems onto others. We need to invest in ourselves as people so we are valuable to others. Conservatives have this part of the equation right. They want to build up assets, things, and ideas, but it is never with a vision of bettering others in some way through that accomplishment later on, or bringing others in the picture to help bring about that goal easier or better than it could be. The problem with conservatives is they want to invest in things only for the sake of protecting themselves from others. Metal heads want to invest in the heavy metal lifestyle like concerts, buying music, clothing, and acting “metal”, and this is done to project their problems into the aggression of their music and act tough instead of seeking a belonging in society that will bring them success in many cases. On the other hand Christians and extreme liberals have the other half of the equation correct because they want to invest in people, but they just want to keep giving what they do not have in many cases. They only have their good will and simple acts of charity, but they never build themselves up to be strong because they keep investing their energy into strangers who will not repay the deeds. Christians are by far the most confusing. On one hand they are fearful of the forces of evil and anyone not like them, so they find internal cohesion based on external threats, but then they turn around to help strangers who may very well be their enemies in the name of god. In many cases this is to try and convert them to their side, but in others they do good will because they want to be rewarded in heaven or blessed in life.

It only makes sense to invest in both ourselves and those close to us. If we just invest in ideas and things we will be lonely, fearful, and insecure. If we just invest in strangers we do not actually improve ourselves to the point that we have anything to offer others, and nobody will want us in their lives if we have no worth. Investing in family seems to be the solution to the problem. Family is not something that is by birth or blood. Family is people who have proven we can trust them over time, and reciprocate our good deeds towards them. These people are usually only small in number and we can count them on one hand. They live with us or near us and we seek to improve each other’s lives, because we find that we can grow stronger as a unit than on our own. Family can change slowly or quickly. A teacher can be part of a faster changing family. Children can be part of a slower changing family.

I understand these are generalizations and I do have some friends that are conservative or metal heads and are conscious of themselves on a level where they will seek improvement in themselves and others, but the generalization seems to hold true more often than not. It was just the other day an old metal head friend of mine said he likes being angry. Of course he does. He likes to not improve his bad situation and be angry about it. Another friend from the same background on the same night said pain is just a feeling, as if it is okay to have as much pain as happiness and that we should stand idle while the pain resonates instead acting to change our situation. It is obvious to me that anger created by letting pain resonate is what gives a sense of power with no actual improvements in life. I have chosen to move away from many of my old friends because they continue to live in fear and insecurity. I am seeking moderation in my life and believe this can only be achieved by living in the environments conducive to my goals and this is achieved by living among those who share those goals with me. I want to strengthen my environment.